sickoflivingalie | Entries tagged with # letter to mickey (andifuckingloveit)

Bad Mistake @ muserevival

Dear Mickey,

You made me have a fucking wet dream, you cunt. Do you know how long it's been since I had one of those? But I don't know what's fucking worse. My dick thinking it's 12 years old again, or the fact I slept through getting a fucking boner because I'm so drugged that I have the functioning ability of approximately a squash worm.

And now I'm fucking thinking about it, it feels like you might be out there fucking new dudes at every truck stop. It makes me feel sick inside, but I know I have no right to feel like that. Was splitting with you a really bad mistake? Some days, it all feels like I'm trapped in a fucking nightmare and maybe I'll wake up back where we're together, and there's no fucking bipolar or you not being you, and everything is something I know how to deal with again.

( Other days, I know I'm not stuck in a nightmare at all. Just stuck in this shithole that I'll probably never get out of... )

Family Matters @ muserevival

Dear Mickey,

This week's been really fucking weird. Oh, who am I kidding, this whole year's been fucking weird... or maybe even my whole life. Can you really consider something weird if it's been your whole life, or does that just make it your normal?

It's kind of like everything's been rebooted. We're all back home, save for Carl who is still in juvie and either going to end up murdered or the HBIC. Fiona's back because she fucked up her marriage, even Lip's been staying here after the chick he was fucking went mental on him and thumped him. Frank's ingratiated himself back into shit because the cancer chick he was apparently chasing offed herself. It's like things have been switched right back to how they were before...

Before you and me.

Shame that doesn't mean I can just switch off all memories of you and be right back there somehow. Life's fucking cruel like that. Some people seem to get everything, and other people, like me, seem to constantly fuck it all up. I ran into Svetlana at the grocery store, but she didn't have Yev with her. Told me that you "Drive truck now" and "make shit money" that's "not enough to feed baby." Guess you really needed to get away. Can't say I blame you. That's not a feeling I can shake.

( I just don't know what family is supposed to mean anymore... )

Memories Made @ muserevival

Dear Mickey,

Been wishing this week that you put a bullet in Sammi's ass or pushed the bitch under a bus. She fucking cheated us out of our first date. At first, I told myself that didn't matter and what would it change anyway? But now it feels like it might have been the flast fighting chance to just get this fucking right.

Do you think about shit like this, or is it just me and my brain that won't fucking shut off? Sizzler, fucking McDonalds, Subway or fucking Taco Bell. I don't even care where it would have been now. I just wish I had that one fucking memory of something normal. Normal people seem to at least be able to get shit right part of the time. But not if you're a Gallagher. Apparently being conceived by Frank Gallagher's cock means you're destined to a life of bullshit and misery. Do you think religious people think the sins of the father should be paid for by the kids? No wonder I'm not fucking religious.

( I miss you, and I miss Yev... )

Love Hurts @ muserevival

Dear Mickey,

I don't know why the fuck I'm writing to you.

I'm supposed to be trying this fucked up thing called journalling. Apparently writing shit down can help stop you being so fucked in the head, but I've got nothing to say to myself. Everything I want to say is to you. But you're not here, and I know that's my fault.

( I know I'm never going to fucking send this... )

Ian Gallagher

"I'm sick of living a lie, aren't you?

Entries tagged with # letter to mickey (andifuckingloveit)

@ muserevoval: 091.3. First Person Prompt

@ muserevoval: 091.3. First Person Prompt

@ muserevival: 090.3. First Person Prompt

@ muserevival: 089.3. First Person Prompt

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